Looking for something more specific?
Enter a search term here:
Enter a search term here:
 Just take a pause. Before. In between. After. That pause can change the trajectory of your outcome. That pause means everything. We hear it all the time: Take a pause. It sounds simple, even obvious. But what does it really mean, for you? For me, I’ve heard this phrase throughout my adult life while parenting, leading a high school counseling department, coordinating intensive events, facilitating team conflict in organizations. I’ve heard this in my kitchen, a classroom, meetings, trainings, conferences, audiences from 4 to 500. This phrase, take a pause, is everywhere. In this edition, I wanted to share my origin stories of the way that I learned how to take a pause. Pause as a Family Ritual Growing up in Fontana, California, before the Auto Club Speedway and Victoria Gardens were built, lived my father, twin sister, and I on Reed Street. The house in this small town first supported agricultural development post-World War II to later evolve into the growing industry that relied on the Pacific Electric Railway. By the time my family moved in during the late 1980’s, it showed its aging creaking floors, old green shag carpet with balding patches, and a yard that needed love and attention. I remember feeling so proud to call this place ours. My father worked in Compton, California which was a 60-mile commute in the most dreadful SoCal traffic. As a mechanic for a bakery, he left for work at 4 a.m. and returned home at 4:10 p.m., carrying fatigue shown in the wrinkles on his forehead and tensed up shoulders. He was silent as his energy yelled for a pause. We had a family rule. Don’t ask for anything until Papa completed a series of transition steps. We didn’t know it then, but these steps were a ritual that we followed like a well-oiled machine:
This daily ritual was a system of care that taught us how pausing wasn’t a luxury. It was essential. It was preparation for re-entry into family life, for each of us. Scissors Same town. Same home. Saturdays. Our yard was our gem. I cannot remember the names of shrubbery, flowers, trees, or cacti. I do remember the colors, the fullness, and how it made me feel. Safe, peaceful. Papa’s religion was tending to it every Saturday morning, assigning us weeding, raking, watering, and trimming. One Saturday, I was asked to trim the edges of the grass. We didn’t have means for fancy gardening tools. My tool? A pair of old, rusted metal scissors. My 13-year-old self sighed, wishing for a real trimmer. But there I was, hands and knees on the ground, cutting the edge of the grass so neat, so straight. The sun was warmer than I wanted. Blisters formed on my thumbs where the scissors rubbed with friction. Hours later, I was done. Physically tired, but mentally rested. Looking at the beautiful edging, I understood intuitively that the stillness required to make that happen was the pause of slowing down, focusing on sensory detail, and getting lost in the mindfulness practice of being one with the grass, the scissors, and myself. The Learning Hidden in the Pause These moments taught me something profound as a young person: pause is not passive. It’s where integration happens. In education, we often emphasize the action of studying harder, working faster, achieving more. It’s the same in our professional lives too as we constantly measure our level of performance. But what if the most transformative learning and performing happen within the pause? When we pause, we process. We reflect. We make meaning. That’s lifelong learning, where humanity means to take time alone and together, becoming more aware, more intentional, more whole. Your Turn What does taking a pause look like for you? How did you learn it? When was the last time you took that pause? And how do you know that your pause was of service to you? Pause is not a luxury; it’s a practice. It’s where growth begins. ∎ Learn more about Sonja & her leadership retreats: sonjamontiel.com/leadership-retreats SONJA MONTIEL Co-Founder of PEQ Performance Consulting www.awarenowmedia.com/sonja-montiel
0 Comments
Your comment will be posted after it is approved.
Leave a Reply. |
